Dear Reader,
The last time you heard from me I was eagerly outlining all the whimsical ways I was going to be so much better at prioritizing rest this year. I’m excited to share that I have found nourishing strategies that have helped me learn how to do this, but it hasn’t looked exactly as I thought it would (but isn’t that always the case?).
When I was in my first year of undergrad, I remember feeling so intimidated by all the highly ambitious, academic people I was surrounded by. Even now, it sometimes feels like I am just pretending to be this ostensibly “smart” person who seems to know what they’re doing in this academic world. I have found it easy to numb this impostor syndrome by being incredibly busy with a plethora of commitments. But being busy never really made me feel full. Being stressed made me feel like I was doing something of importance, but my hands were simply shakier and I would be more exhausted than ever by the end of the day.
One thing I have been working on in the last few weeks is learning to embrace my humanness as a student.
It feels silly to say, but it’s something I have had to increasingly focus on for the sake of my mental health. Here are a few little things that have helped me, and honestly, as a by-product, I have noticed my capacity to focus in class and learn has improved–which is a win-win for me!
Have a Lunch Break.
Have you ever sat someplace while studying, your cold Tupperware of yesterday’s leftovers right next to your laptop? You shovel your food into your mouth while your eyes skim through your overpriced textbook. Sometimes, you say you'll make plans to study with a friend, but instead you end up divulging all your random childhood lore.
I kept getting caught in this trap, which made me feel crazy. I would spend so much time “studying” but I wouldn’t be studying in any productive fashion. So, I decided to pretend I was in elementary school.
Do you remember when you were little and you had lunch breaks? I had almost forgotten too. So, every single day I carve out one hour to meet up with my friends, eat my food, and yap as much as our hearts desire, just for the one hour. It has changed my productivity, and given me space to feel more normal as I navigate school and life.
Set Aside a Specific Time for Rest
I thought it would be unrealistic to try to “Sabbath” once a week. I realized, though, that if I can make time to pin photos of cute puppies on Pinterest and curate playlists, I can make time to intentionally rest. Through my story and the way I see the world, I find a lot of value in reading my Bible and journaling. This is something that I find really restful and soul-filling. So, once a week, I block off an afternoon in my calendar to journal and read my Bible by the water. It’s been such a wonderful way to soak up all the lovely sunshine we’ve had in Kingston recently and intentionally practise pausing from schoolwork. I have not been perfect at it, but try to fill at least an afternoon once a week to let myself intentionally rest.
Go Look at the Water
One of the things that enchanted me most about our stunning campus at Queen's was how close the lake was. Sometimes, it is easy to forget it is there–that there is an entire world outside of our systems and social lives and stress. Once a day at least, I have tried to make a point to make my way to the water, even if it is just to stare at it for a brief second, to calm my nervous system just a tad. It grounds me somehow, reminding me that things will end up okay, as swamped as I feel.
Saying “Life is full” Instead of “Life is busy”
I don’t feel the need to overly elaborate on this because the statement speaks for itself. I too have been swept into imposing “busyness” as a normal response to a genuine, “How are you?” But that feels icky–we get to be here, and the opportunity to have a full calendar is a privilege I am beginning to realize. So, I am trying to change my language from “busy” to “full”–it feels more pertinent to how this moment feels anyway.
What things have been helpful to you in feeling a bit more free from the limitations that being busy brings?
Until next time, cheers!
Hannah